What is the most powerful thing that you can do for yourself today, that will have the greatest impact on your life in the long run?
It was not really a question I was asking while on a leisurely stroll this morning. In fact, I could have easily opted for a playlist and have music blasting through my headphones, planning my day and making mental lists, or just dancing in my head to the beat of my favourite song, but I didn’t. I chose to listen to a podcast and got a message that caught me off guard.
Fact is, I have been feeling stuck lately. You know, like when you carry on with life in general but nothing new happens? Almost as if your world is on pause, you are doing the same things, thinking the same thoughts, worry the same worries while the only thing rushing by is time…
Do you know the feeling? You do not know what it is. But you are bothered!
Possibly irritated too as people you do not particularly like (let’s call them the nasties), and left behind and out of your life for valid reasons are occupying your headspace uninvited. I’m not talking about manic obsession or emotional, roller-coaster teary-eyed attachment, it is far more serious than that. It is like the nasties just got stuck to you like invisible glue. You know that you have moved on from them, but every now and again they shout your name and wave – stealing your thoughts! I perhaps was dealing with all of the above whether I was consciously aware of it or not at the time.
So, back to the podcast. As I walk along listening, the topic starts to crystalise around asking people for forgiveness. That was not necessarily the topic I selected but I go along with it anyway and try and identify people I need to ask for forgiveness in any shape or form, at any stage in my life. I visualise faces, even think of the nasties and try and put myself on the other side. Do I need to ask some nasties for forgiveness perhaps? Have I ever thought of it this way? The more the steady voice in the headphones takes me on this journey – and the more I toyed with the thought, the clearer it became.
Could it be me that I had to ask for forgiveness? The young Hannah, the one who made mistakes? Suddenly I am not sure. It is an uncomfortable space. I am sure there were people in my life that could benefit from an apology, but was I one of them?
It is interesting but I think we forgive other people way easier than we do ourselves. We are so much harder on ourselves than we are on others.
Was it possible to get stuck because you did not allow yourself to move? Did you keep on dealing with negative, hurtful feelings, emotions or thoughts because you were so cross with getting yourself in this position, that you did not notice that the chains were bolted by yourself? Were you so busy worrying about….everything plus a pile of bullsh*t on the side, that your mind starting operating in battery saving-mode, focusing on scarcity and fear instead of joy and happiness?
It might be that in a journey where we expect to heal we get so caught up and confused that we end up creating our own drift sand!
So today is a perfect day to get out of the drift sand and take a huge step forward. Time to get it over with for good, to unglue the past, the nasties, the bad experiences that is keeping us back and to do the most powerful thing for ourselves imaginable. Forgive yourself and allow for new opportunity! It is never too late to be happy!
What do you need to forgive ourselves for today?
Is it perhaps:
- Wasting your best years with someone or something that was not worth it?
- Not having the guts to walk away when you should have?
- Saying yes to injustice, while your entire being was screaming NO!?
- Going with the flow to please others when you have not pleased yourself?
- Not standing up for your rights/assets/cause as you could not stomach the fight or backlash?
- Keeping quiet when you should have spoken up?
- Making excuses for someone while it was clear that they lacked a spine?
- Staying too long when you could have been brave sooner?
- Allowing abuse, emotional neglect or financial squandering of your resources?
- Doing what others wanted you to instead of following your heart or dream?
- Accepting being mediocre while you could have soared
- Wasting time to live your dream?
- Thinking of others but forgetting you?
It is time to stop and to forgive yourself, this is your gift to yourself today. Time can never be turned back but you can start today and create a new tomorrow.
Get outside take a step and set yourself free. Imagine each step you take as another huge leap out of the drift sand! Do it today.
Finding your forward is about taking one step at a time. You are worth it. See you on the other side!
